The Buffoon had his manager's meeting today and came back all fired up. This usually occurs some time in the second week of each month. All the managers are assembled and typical meeting bullshit takes place. The top performers are applauded while the bottom-dwellers are silently recognized by all those who read the monthly sales... Continue Reading →
Cinco
“State Bank, this is Nic”, I said answering his call. “Hey, it’s me. Can you come into my office please?”, the Buffoon said in all seriousness. He’d once again failed to pick up on my sarcasm. The Buffoon sits approximately 20 feet away from me in an office with floor-to-ceiling windows which my desk squarely... Continue Reading →
Order the Appraisal
Many years ago when I first entered the real world, the country was in the midst of a mortgage boom. New mortgage brokerages were popping up everywhere, creating waves of new opportunities for young, professional neophytes. It was in that setting that I secured my first real job, handling mortgage refinances along side a floor... Continue Reading →
Vacation Time
“Hey, I wanted to check with you about vacation time. I am thinking about taking my week vacation from Sept. 6th through the 10th. I wanted to see if you or Sonjia had anything planned for that time", I said to Buffoon. “Wayl’, I need to check with my wife ‘cause we may have something... Continue Reading →
Do As I Say vs. Do As I Do
This morning I attended a meet-and-greet event that was hosted by a local group which promotes the advancement of Latino businesses within the community. The event was somewhat interesting. The mayor was in attendance and mailed in a short, four-minute speech. Plus, it was a good excuse for me to get out of the office.... Continue Reading →
If You Can’t Get There In One…
While I was growing up, my family lived in a subdivision that was built around a golf course. Our house happened to back up to the number 6 hole which was a long par-5 with a dog leg left. For most of my adolescence I resented golf and, like my dad, viewed it has boring... Continue Reading →
Clock Is Ticking
The word we're hearing is that Gunty is gone. Apparently, she and the company reached some agreement that allowed her to step down gracefully. I'm sure that's complete bullshit. Gunty's numbers have been down for a while and the company decided to make a change. It should be noted that Gunty has taken two somewhat... Continue Reading →
Those People
Today this old fat man came in looking for the Buffoon. I told him the Buffoon was not in the office, but the fat man hardly listened. He said that he just wanted to inform me that he was back from Boston and would be in town for a little while. As I was wondering... Continue Reading →
“Hey Dude”
“Hey, dude, how long will it take to...” “Do not call me ‘dude’. You need to call me ‘Sir’”, he said cutting me off. The look in eyes matched his tone and confirmed he was legitimately pissed off. A little annoyed and largely intimidated, I faked a sarcastic smirk and walk away without finishing my... Continue Reading →
Knock on the Wood
Today we were forced to endure yet another one of the Buffoon's asinine meetings. Towards the end, he and the Middle Eastern Fembot had the following exchange: Evil Fembot: "How many brothers and sisters do you have?" Buffoon: "Two sisters and there were six boys, but one of the brothers died" Evil Fembot: "Knock on... Continue Reading →
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